Sunday, June 28, 2009

Had another orientation this week, this time at Epcor. By far one of the better orientations I've been through this year, as it had the least amount of stupid questions in the quiz portion. I am so sick of questions that go along the lines of:

12 – Before you enter a work site, who must review the Safe Work Permit?
a. The crew leader.
b. The other employees.
c. The shift supervisor.
d. a and c
e. all of the above.
f. none of the above.
g. b and d, but not c.
h. g and c, but not d.

Or questions like this:

12 – What should you do before operating a vehicle in a new area?
a. Just do whatever.
b. Back the vehicle in.
c. Ensure that you receive a hot work permit from the supervisors office. Have a gas test performed in the specified area to ensure that no explosive gases are present.
d. Like, really, whatever.
e. a and c

Hey, remember that giant plume of fire that I mentioned? Well, I finally got around to getting the picture off of my cell phone. Behold! Look upon yonder wasted petrochemical gas and despair!



It was also our last day of spraying at BP. Even though their safety standards are through the roof, you gotta admit I look good doing it:



Everybody died this week. Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett on the same day. Then Billy Mays. And now, Darrin's Xbox 360 got the red rings of death this afternoon. And it isn't even under the extended warranty anymore. Sad.

For some reason I've had June 26 marked on my calendar as the day that Transformers 2 came out, so I booked the Saturday off so I could seet it Friday night. Well, it came out Tuesday at midnight, which I didn't realize until after the fact. That hurt. And then I sprayed around transformers all day when I was working the electrical substations for Epcor. Rub it in, why don'cha? After dodging spoilers for four days I finally saw Transformers 2 on yesterday! What did I think of it? Well, it looked amazing. As usual, great special effects. As for the rest of the movie, I can only say that it was twice as X as the first one. The fight scenes were twice as good. There were twice as many robots. But there were also twice as many terrible “comedy” moments. The plot was twice as discombobulated. Also, the Autobot twins. Oh geez, where to start with that? Okay, first imagine Jar-Jar Binks. Now imagine that instead of a mangled Jamaican accent he talks crunk southern, has a gold tooth, and is (and I'm serious, this is from the movie) illiterate. Now imagine that THERE ARE TWO OF HIM. Yeah, they're that bad.

Also halfway through the first act the movie stops being “Transformers 2” and is “Species 4” for a few minutes. I'm serious, this is a ridiculous movie. Also there's a buttload of cursing, dog humping, and some drug references thrown in. This really isn't a movie for kids, which makes the fact that part of the toy line is aimed at the “five and under” crowd REALLY irritating. Would you make a colouring book out of Terminator and encourage people to bring six-year-olds to that movie? I say thee NAY. Rotten Tomatoes is giving it a 21%, and I give two stars outta four; the fight scenes did rock my socks off, but it's for genre enthusiasts only. Also I paid $17 so that I could see it in IMAX. That's a lot, and I'm not sure if it really added anything.

Oh my gosh, here are the videos!

I can't remember if I posted this one before, but I recently rediscovered it in my old favourites.

OFFICE WAR!!


The Great Office War

You may think this next video is a joke, but it is real and that's what makes it AMAZING.

Japanese live action Spider-Man TV series!



Poor cat. There are full episodes up at the marvel website and it's just as amazing as the trailer makes it out to be. It's also just as Japanese as the trailer makes it out to be. Spidey has a giant robot and shouts “Spider Strings!” before he shoots webbing. Oh gorsh, it's not a stereotype if it's 100% true, right?

The next video is about materialism. It's also terrifying, so don't watch it where anyone could hear it without seeing the video or your co-workers/spouse will really wonder what you are up to.

World of Warcraft Freakout



If that video left you depressed, then watch this re-mix!



No, I have no idea why he does what he does with the remote control. The shoe I understand, but the remote control continues to baffle me.

Sunday, June 21, 2009

Now with more fire

Wow, just when you think they've done it all, Marvel is bringing back the clone saga. The Clone Saga is a punch line. It's the industry staple for terrible shifts in a franchise's existence. It's the benchmark. They say, "Well it was bad, but was it 'Clone Saga' bad?" What's the motivation behind this? Bleh.

Friday I had the day off. And what did I accomplish? WHAT!?! A few things, actually. I went to Canadian Tire and bought the stuff I needed to weed/feed the lawn. Then I pruned the tree in our backyard. I don't like out of control trees, and the shoots were covered in bugs and crap anyway. I rained on and off, so I never got around to cleaning my car.

Telus tried to trick me into going to a monthly plan. The sent me a letter that was all “Heeeey, based on your usage these monthly plans would be like soooooo much better.” And I was all, “eh, maybe.” I usually just put a $25 pay and talk card on there once a month, so the $20 looked pretty good. Then I read on the Telus website that the plan has an extra $7 system access fee on it per month. Lame. Nice try, Telus, but no dice.

Worked industrial at BP this week. The British Petroleum, not the Boston Pizza. BP has the most effective/hardcore safety program I've seen out of any of the industrial sites that we've sprayed. When we're spraying an area we first get it cleared from the operators to make sure nobody even drives near the place. Then our team's safetey watch makes people give us a thirty foot berth while we're spraying. Plus it's mandatory to wear the respirators there. The crazy part? This is the exact same stuff that we were spraying all over the University of Alberta where people were walking around us while we were working. Man, whatever.

On Saturday I saw a 300 foot jet of flame coming from Dow Chemical. Since it was off in the distance, I didn't even notice it at first. I heard a loud whooshing sound followed by a brief silence. Then a constant roar which sounded like a jet fighter. Then I turned around and saw a flare tower with a flare that was about three times the size of the tower coming out of it and billowing black smoke. Yikes. From my Google Earth estimates, I think I was only 1.5 clicks away when it happened.

Video time!

Obama kills fly like a ninja!



MC Hammer Pants Flash Mob



Gymnast Put to Sleep After Breaking Leg

Sunday, June 14, 2009

On Wednesday I was having a really crappy day because I forgot my lunch at the shop and we had some very long a frustrating sites. By the end of the day I was fuming about never having time to myself, and then Dave offered me Friday off! So I took it, yay! And then Thursday night dad was in town so we had dinner at Fargo's. He had a jalapeƱo burger and I had a seafood thingy. Both awesome.

Thursday was a good day. I bought a whole bunch of stuff to clean my car with. Spent about $100 at Canadian Tire for everything. I read a TON of comic books including but not limited to: Ultimate Power and Ultimate Fantastic four HC Vol 3. UP and UFF are good stories, but they're drawn by Greg Land. This guy... I just can't take him seriously. He swipes pictures from other artists, from real life models, and copies his own stuff over and over. Bleh. Here's an example of his work:



Found that on JIMSMASH!! Greg Land Swipe Files. Be forewarned: Greg Land also traces some models from pronographic material, so... be careful while scrolling.


I finally got around to cutting my hair. The new electric trimmer I bought works great, but I couldn't remember if my last haircut was 1/4 inch or 1/8 inch. So I decided to go with 1/8 inch. Wow, that's short. It looks pretty funky when it's halfway done. But now I'm practically a skinhead. Maybe I should get somebody to put lightning bolts in it.

Some dude playing soccer started giving me lip while I was spraying weeds at U of A. Started asking me why they weren't informed about it, and saying that people can have allergic reactions to RoundUp. Then tells me that I “should have a mask on. That's a carcinogen. It causes cancer.” So I checked the MSDS when I got back to the truck, and the guy is full of crap. Worst case scenario is that you get retinal damage from getting an eyeful of the concentrated product. Whatever, man. I guess he was looking out for my well being, but he really should do his research next time.

Video Time! This time there's a theme. Can you catch it?



If you listen carefully, you can hear part of this next clip on the movie "Up!" near the beginning. I didn't notice it until they mentioned the Schnider (sp?) lens.



Possibly the greatest thirty two seconds of television ever:



Got any good links/videos/funny images? Send them my way!

Sunday, June 7, 2009

Meanwhile, back at the refinery...

I wear a hardhat, blue Nomex coveralls, and a gas monitor to work. Now I am a real man! We've been doing industrial vegitation control at PetroCan for the last few weeks. Working at the refinery is... interesting. Because there are so many different companies and people moving around, you need to get a “safe work permit” before you can go to your section of the plant to start working. That involves going to one of the seven or eight permit offices, waiting for ten minutes while they talk to someone else, and then they walk out of the room and say “we've got a meeting, no permits for 45 minutes.” Since we're spraying weeds all over the plant, we usually need permits from EVERY office, so we just to to one where there isn't a meeting/lunch break/werewolf holding up our time. Between my coworker and myself it took us TWO HOURS to get all of the permits we needed to start the day. And after spraying only one tank on Friday, we got rained out. Lesson learned: it's probably easier just to get permits as you need them instead of getting all of them at once.

But since I was rained out, I went to West Edmonton Mall and saw Pixar's “Up”. The were two times when I cried during the movie. The second was during the first ten minutes (after Carl's life story). The first time I cried was when I found out that “Disney Digital 3D” means that I get to pay $3 extra. Egad, I have to pay more for something I didn't even want? My finger hovered precariously over “Terminator: Salvation” for a minute before I just bit the bullet and went with “Up.” The good news is, the 3D didn't make me nauseous. The bed news is that I paid $3 to wear glasses that add NOTHING to the experience. The best part of the 3D effects was when I forgot I was wearing them. Every once in a while I would stop and say, “Oh, right now the movie looks sort of like two different 2D images on a slightly different depth.” Bah! *dismissive hand wave*.

Other then that, awesome movie. Highly recommended.

Oh! Also I went out and did some residential Round-up spraying between Petrocan Days. In which we got to use the spray packs! Instead of fighting a hose, I get to strap a big Ghostbuster pack to my back and walk around spraying weeds. Good times!

For your video, here's something amazing that came out of this years E3 (video game showcase).